Dot Remembers

(As told by Dot to Marcie)

Al and DorOthy (he always said he was surprised that the name had a second O) were married on May 14, 1992 after a courtship over the bridge tables and dance-floors of New England. She feels that her 16 years of marriage were like a vacation("Every day we'd get up and say: ‘What could we do today?’"); but we all marvel at the love and the care and support she gave through his decline over the year.


Al and Dot's Wedding in 1992.


She was with him every day, and when he died.

They were a good match she felt because they shared feelings of the enormity of the lost of their beloved first partners Bill and Rosemary, with whom they both chose to be laid to rest. They both loved dancing, the "American songbook," bridge, dining out and a hot cup of tea when they'd return home. They enjoyed their winters in Florida, and especially the new friendships they forged as a couple, especially with Frank and Violet Eckloff, Nancy Oden, and Tony Romano.

Dottie shared a wonderful story about when they were first dating and Al was inexcusably late for a family party—She disinvited him. When her son Billy asked why Al hadn't been at the family party as planned, she said "It's a long story." Al tried to make up for the misunderstanding by buying up an entire florists potted plants, and delivering them to her house later. When Dottie returned to the house, Billy reported: "The long story's been here!"



She also knew that Al needed his independence and privacy. For all of their marriage she'd spend one night a week at her home in Warwick. Until he was too weakened by disease, she honored his personal wishes. She remarked " He'd like to see the backside of me!"

In his last months he also acknowledged the gift that she and and Lisa had given him, that religions can offer in the power of prayer, hoping to be reunited with loved ones and acceptance of cycle of life. Dot prayed with Al, and she was so moved when he said: "I said a prayer, that God will take care of you after I die."

And so shall we all.


"The Outlaws" as Dottie said:
Her brother Gerry and Ron Carr, Al, Shirley and the late George Carr, and Dottie in front.